Basic directories don’t work. But they’re still charging £££ to join.

Wedding suppliers work SO hard. If industry website owners and editors don’t recognise that and provide value – ie work hard FOR you – they’re not worth your money. 

English Wedding’s supplier listings include keyword links which work harder to show search engines your content. And I reach out regularly to our members to ask if they have weddings, product launches or other content to share because I want them to be seen, and I feel a responsibility to help boost their SEO efforts however I can.

Authenticity wins over AI. Always.

Real, honest images and heartfelt words hold value in a rapidly changing digital world. AI wedding content is out there, playing the algorithms and winning. Wedding blogs are the antidote to impossible wedding inspiration, sharing genuine advice and real couples’ celebrations.

“Best wedding supplier” lists should be free. 

It’s hard to believe, but some pretty major publications are reaching out to suppliers and asking for payment for being included on a “Top 50…” list. This is unfair.

Wedding awards: good, bad, and ugly.

When wedding awards are genuine, they’re ace. 

When they’re an opportunity to hear amazing client feedback, they’re absolutely worth entering.

When they’re nothing more than a social media popularity contest (for ‘votes’) they’re basically fake.

When they cause anxiety, cost a fortune and take endless hours of your time, they’re unkind.

Remember magazines?

English Wedding took off in 2009 when I published a review of print wedding magazines. The page content of most was 80%+ advertising (with up to 20% being real weddings, advice articles and editorial content). 

Wedding blogs soared in popularity because they were free to read, featured real couples and were more than a selling tool. In contrast to the print magazines of the time, which were FULL of things you should buy – and not much else, blogs were a breath of fresh air. 

Having an honest voice is even more important now than it was then. 

Wedding blogs were founded on honesty. 

Bloggers revolutionised the wedding media in 2008. They were the only independent voices in the wedding industry. Kudos to social media: it’s given every indie wedding business a platform to shine. The wedding industry is made up of thousands of brilliant humans who adore their work and speak from the heart. Blogs are still so relevant: for SEO, and for showcasing businesses and amplifying their voices wherever we can.

It’s taken me days to finish this little article, and I’ve realised that’s because I’m conflicted. I’m super proud of English Wedding, but at the same time I feel it’s never been a major force in the wedding industry like Love My Dress or Rock n Roll Bride. I have membership fees for photographers, wedding planners, florists and all the other wedding supplier types to join English Wedding, be listed on the website and showcase their services. 

I’ve been tormenting myself – is it wrong to ask wedding business owners to pay to join my website? But no. This is different. I charge a tiny fee and I work my heart out giving members SEO-focused feature articles. 

And so we’re being honest, transparent and authentic. I make about £500 a month from English Wedding, less what I pay for hosting, tax and so on. I’m not a huge publishing company, I run this website with integrity and a passion to do the very best I can for all of the brands I support. 

I still hear stories of wedding venues who won’t recommend suppliers unless they pay to be on a list. Photographers say they’ve been approached by national magazines and asked to pay a small fortune for inclusion in a “best photographers” article. This is just so wrong. 

No one in the wedding industry should be asked to pay for “exposure”. 

Wedding websites can be honourable, honest, and open. They can share genuine talent and integrity and promote independent wedding businesses. Wedding blogs have been doing this for almost two decades. It’s the reason English Wedding exists – and has been since day one.

The post The future for wedding websites is bright, shining honesty. Here’s why. appeared first on English Wedding.

I gave up on posing a little while ago. I stumbled across photographers like Tracy Jade & Naomi Goggin who were just letting couples exist in their own space. It was a lightbulb moment – I’ve also studied under Jesh de Rox and Luis Garvan and all sorts of photographers who have approaches to working with people and emotions. And whilst their methods usually produce something more natural, it always felt somehow manipulative and dishonest to do this on a wedding day – a day that should be filled with natural emotion.

Yesterday, I was shooting the wedding of a same sex couple, and I felt I had to explain myself. Because it probably looks like I don’t know how to pose a same sex couple, whereas the reality is that I don’t know how to pose any couple.

Or, to be more precise, I don’t know how to pose in a way that doesn’t turn people into gender clichés and stereotypes. Whether they’re straight, gay or any other complex shade of the spectrum. Posing is inherently weird, and even weirder in the context of wedding photography. It communicates things about a couple and their relationship – things that may have absolutely nothing to do with that couple.

A broader issue

The wedding industry has long been steeped in traditional gender roles and expectations, often reflecting outdated stereotypes about what grooms and brides should look like, act like, and prioritise during their big day. However, as society evolves toward greater inclusivity and individuality, there is a growing movement to challenge and reshape these norms, allowing weddings to be authentic celebrations that reflect the diverse identities of all couples.

Of course there are plenty of exceptions to this and some wonderful wedding blogs embracing diversity and showing different styles of wedding… But I’m not seeing it reflected in education for wedding photographers – and the styling and couples shown in weddings across the wedding media, Pinterest, Instagram and TikTok just reinforce the visual message of a very homogeneous wedding. (Probably the peril of being in the trade – but I see a wonky picture of a groom and bride filling a champagne tower every time I open up social media). To echo my own website – Not everyone wants to be a Disney princess or James Bond on their wedding day.

This becomes especially problematic when couples don’t fit those moulds.

Same-sex couples, non-binary partners, and those who feel uncomfortable with traditional binary roles often find themselves misrepresented, or worse—excluded—from the wedding photography narrative. Instead of capturing their authentic story and love, photos can end up reinforcing clichés that don’t resonate with them.

And it becomes even more important in the long-term as photos and the media we create become family heirlooms – historical documents that tell us about our families and their histories.

I think we’ll always be able to excuse it with “that’s just what fashions dictated at the time”. But I also think we lose the magic of capturing who the people in the photo really are, and what they meant to each other. I think being able to bottle even a tiny fraction of that is why a lot of us picked up a camera in the first place.

What can we do as wedding photographers / vendors

Breaking away from gender stereotypes in wedding photography doesn’t mean abandoning romance or tradition altogether. It means allowing couples to define how they want to be seen. Here are a few ways photographers can shift their practice:

• Educate ourselves. Understanding your clients means more than knowing LGBTQ+ terminology or history. It’s about listening. Photojournalist Jonas Peterson highlights that listening is the first step in telling someone’s story. Ask open questions early on, learn what makes each couple tick, and avoid assumptions based on gender or tradition. (I love meeting people on their home turf. You learn so much about a couple by just being in their space.)
• Pose for personality, not gender. Instead of defaulting to “the bride looks delicate, the groom looks strong,” focus on what feels natural to the couple. Some people love being playful, others prefer elegance — neither should be tied to gender. Personally I’m playing with trying to create space for couples to be themselves. It’s a pretty awkward space for the first minute or so, but then it transitions into something more personal and collaborative. (I’m planning to cover this more in depth on my own blog.)
  
• Balance the coverage. Give equal attention to all partners in photos and albums. It’s common to see brides featured prominently while grooms or partners feel sidelined—avoid this by showcasing genuine connection and individuality. (And this is an ongoing conversation on English Wedding too.)
• Use inclusive language. Replace “bride and groom” with “partners” or “couple,” especially in communications and marketing.
• Show inclusive photos. Similar to above – showing a wide range of clients, cultures and experiences in our visual storytelling echoes the message to come as you are, not as what is expected of you.
• Highlight authentic moments. The truest photographs often come from documentary-style coverage, capturing laughter, vulnerability, and connection without staging gendered roles.
• Educate clients. Help couples move beyond Pinterest-perfection and embrace their unique relationship dynamics. Your guidance can free them from cookie-cutter expectations.

Preparation Time

I want to also shine a spotlight on preparation time, as I believe traditionally, we weight this in favour of the bride and produce a responsibility on the bridal party to be both the centre of attention, and often quite vulnerable. It also echoes the stereotype that only brides care about their appearance or find getting ready meaningful, while grooms are portrayed as afterthoughts who simply put on a suit.

Of course your couples are going to have priorities and preferences. (Personally I love it when they break with tradition and get ready together – not just for the convenience, but for the care and attention they show to each other on the morning of the wedding) I’d also refer back to the point above – Educate yourself about your clients, ask lots of questions.

Also an actual selling point, as a photographer

Modern couples increasingly seek authenticity and personalisation. They want wedding photographs that truly represent who they are—not society’s idea of who they should be. Offering a portfolio and style that embrace diverse relationships and expressions attracts a wider and more engaged clientele.

Breaking free from predictable gendered poses also pushes photographers creatively. It’s an opportunity to explore deeper storytelling and produce images that resonate emotionally — keeping your work fresh, meaningful, and compelling.

Conclusion

Challenging gender stereotypes in wedding photography isn’t about discarding tradition entirely; it’s about expanding the narrative to include all couples and expressions of love. It allows wedding photography to fulfill its highest calling: capturing not just how couples look on their day, but who they really are.

By listening, learning, and adapting our approaches, we as photographers and vendors can help make weddings — and wedding photography — a more welcoming, authentic celebration for everyone. And that’s got to be a good thing.

PS. Another word on posing / not posing

I may not have convinced you about letting go of posing and directing – and there may indeed be a third way. But I thought I should add this little tidbit from Dawoud Bey’s On photographing people and communities. Dawoud has been photographing strangers since before I was in nappies – and I’m no spring chicken. I’m going to leave with a quote from the book that really stuck with me:

“The things that are going on in the world are so much more interesting than anything you can make up…. If the pose comes from the subject, it will ring truer than anything I can direct. I can’t anticipate subtleties like the drape of her hand or the placement of his hand – the little poetic gestures or grace notes. I have to let them evolve and then recognise them when I see them.” (Page 52, if you want to get hold of a copy)

The post Embracing Every Love Story: Dismantling Gender Roles in Wedding Photography appeared first on English Wedding.

As well as writing English Wedding, I’m a calligrapher and wedding stationer. This image was from a styled photoshoot at Ghyll Barn, taken by Hannah Hall Photography. See the full supplier list below, and tap to see this deepest winter wedding inspiration on our blog.

Styled shoots are how we show you ideas

I’m a calligrapher. I write beautiful menus, place names and table plans for weddings. I can design gorgeous samples in trending colour palettes – but getting decent photos is hard. Collaborating with other creatives is how I show you what I can do. The same applies for cake designers, florists, hair and make up artists, stylists, dress designers and so on. At styled shoots we get to show off the most amazing designs we can create, and share them with you.

Styled shoots make dream teams – and that matters for weddings

Collaborating on a styled photoshoot is a lovely way for suppliers and photographers to connect, without the pressure of a wedding where everyone is super busy, and cake makers / florists might arrive super early, leaving before the ceremony. At a styled shoot, we all have time to talk, to catch up – and to get to know each other. I’ve been at styled shoots and seen how hard other suppliers work: photographers, stylists and floral designers I admire you SO much. And this all means we can recommend each other to our couples, with the genuine knowledge that we’re recommending people who care deeply about the weddings they work on.

Styled shoots should be free for suppliers…

… or at least, those who can afford to might chip in for model fees or anything that needs to be bought in. The whole thing of ‘portfolio building workshops’ began when I was already a wedding blogger, and honestly I have mixed feelings about these. I love seeing styled shoots where local suppliers have joined forces – for all the reasons I just mentioned. But if a dozen photographers have paid to travel to France where they’ll work with suppliers they’ll never meet again… I don’t understand the added value. (There’s a little to be said for collaboration over competition, and photographers sharing experiences and techniques and learning from each other, perhaps.)

No one should ever claim a styled shoot as a wedding

This does make me angry – but it’s very rare. Some inexperienced photographers will publish images from styled shoots as though they were weddings. Honest suppliers and bloggers will always say when the images they share are from a styled photoshoot. There’s a secret to recognising styled shoot images. In the words of Ariel at Offbeat Wed, “You can almost always spot a styled shoot: everyone looks perfect, and there seems to be a lack of guests at the “wedding.”” Very occasionally I’ve been sent styled shoots with a write up that skirts around the truth – and I will always make it super, super clear that it’s an editorial shoot and not a real wedding.

Styled shoots are amazing for content – and all suppliers need to be seen

In the age of content creation, and the explosion of BTS footage I’m seeing from suppliers on instagram, a styled shoot is a lovely opportunity for wedding creatives to generate content. We all have to be prolific on social media these days – and that’s hard. Creating BTS footage while a wedding is happening, or under the time pressures of setting up before a wedding, is a lot for creatives and photographers to have to do. Styled shoots are a more relaxed environment for doing this – and those stunning images can be used for blog posts, guest articles on other websites, and to get features on major wedding blogs where visuals are really key. If you’re a supplier and want to read around this, check our blog wedding SEO tips that actually work!

Styled shoots for diversity and inclusivity

Since 2020 I’ve had a Diversity first pledge on English Wedding. It’s really important to try and showcase as many diverse weddings and photoshoots on blogs as possible. (I wish I got more submissions – if you’re a photographer with a wedding or photoshoot that fits this pledge, please submit to the blog!) The truth is, even bridal designers have gradually moved away from using Black and Asian models since 2020, and the lack of disabled couples on mainstream blogs is a problem. (See above – submit if you can!)

From a supplier’s perspective, having a portfolio of images which reflects diversity and inclusivity is important. Collaborating on a styled shoot can be a way to kickstart bookings from couples other than white, heterosexual couples – and a way to show that this is important to you and your business.

Styled photoshoots can evolve your wedding business

If you’re looking to reach more diverse couples, or to take more bookings from a local venue you love, then styled photoshoots can evolve your wedding business to where you want it to be. I adore styled shoots as a supplier because they’re a rare chance to catch up with lovely people working in weddings locally, to explore new venues and meet new people – and to have fun. There’s nothing lovelier than a creative day out with other people who are self-employed working in weddings.

A last word: do “brides eat the BS”?!

The answer is no. This came from that Reddit I mentioned at the top of this article. A photographer (I assume) implied that suppliers were passing off images from shoots as real weddings, and that “brides eat the BS” – i.e., that brides believe it’s real. How rude!!! I like to credit both grooms and brides with more savvy than that. You’re not out there looking at styled photoshoots with tons of florals and layer upon layer of styling, and thinking it’ll all cost a couple of hundred quid!

So styled shoots, presented honestly, can provide inspiration. It’s your actual conversations with your florist, venue stylist and stationer which will help you decide how you actually style your wedding. Balance is important, but inspiration is a beautiful place to begin – and that’s why I love styled wedding shoots!

Tap here if you have a styled photoshoot to submit to English Wedding

The post They can be controversial, but I still love styled shoots: here’s why. appeared first on English Wedding.

First though, a shout out to all my documentary wedding photographer friends. I love you, because you’re not hiding grooms behind brides! Honestly, this is one of the top reasons I love documentary wedding photography more than any other style. The other was put beautifully by a recent interview on the Nine Dots podcast: documentary rules because one day these people will die. But I’m saving that one up for a future blog post! (Do email me if you’d like to be quoted!) Back to grooms, and while documentary wedding photography is where equality in weddings SHINES, this style isn’t exactly the darling of mainstream wedding media.

Why are magazines still flogging the “weddings are for women” look?

So. We have a raft of wedding print magazines with women’s faces on the covers. (Quick Google search for reference: 14 front covers found instantly; 14 women and 2 men. It’s not scientific research, but from within the industry, this is something we already knew, right?) What’s wrong with equality, print editors?

Not all weddings have a bride. I have, and will ALWAYS champion LGBTQ+ weddings in this corner of the internet. How many grooms are picking up these magazines in supermarkets? Is it because men don’t buy magazines, that all these women are smiling directly at me from Tesco’s shelves? I don’t know. But those shelves – and the publishing companies filling them – are excluding half of the population and discriminating against men marrying men – when they should celebrate equality and every kind of love.

Why put so much pressure on brides alone?

For anyone wondering if this is a positive: empowering women, celebrating independence in an arena (weddings) where we take centre stage.

Weddings are partnerships. Weddings should never be “all about the bride”. Of course, finding a dress is important and exciting to everyone who’s wearing one for their big day. I will celebrate the once-in-a-lifetime experience of wearing a wedding dress along with the very best of them – but I wish there were more outlets really championing the joy of finding impeccable, smart, gorgeous wedding menswear too.

And by placing all the emphasis via front covers and styled photoshoots on brides, we’re exacerbating what became cutely known as wedding “planxiety” a couple of years ago. Only it’s not cute: it’s real. Some – not all – brides-to-be are feeling they have to stage manage perfect weddings with every detail curated and coordinated, and it’s breaking them. Wedding stress is real. Advice (including from mental health professionals) here.

I’ve always been more than a little cynical about the wedding print magazine industry. Back in 2010 I sat down with a pile of wedding magazines and counted the number of pages devoted to a) advertising b) advice and editorial and c) real weddings. In almost all of the publications I looked at, over 80% of the pages were completely devoted to advertising products to buy for weddings. Often, the first thirty pages were full page dress advertisements. And to me that said, loud and clear, that wedding magazines’ existence and purpose was to sell: to persuade women they needed to spend a fortune on weddings. (Not true. And I honestly don’t think we believe them any more.)

Perhaps there’s something in the idea that the people behind those print magazines think women are an easier target for their marketing. That we’re more easily persuaded to spend our money on pretty things we don’t need. Maybe the publishing companies are the cynical ones, targeting women exclusively they think because we’re easier to exploit for money?

Photo by Jakob Owens on Unsplash

Equality is the way forward: the wedding media can drive that change

Wouldn’t it be nice if brides knew they weren’t alone. If the expectation that weddings were “a woman’s thing” didn’t exist. If we all knew that weddings were a journey for couples to make together, and that planning them was the first step couples made together in their lifelong commitment to one another.

But why would we? Who would ever think, faced with a supermarket shelf full of grinning women in white and veils, that women weren’t alone in planning their weddings?

It almost feels like a trend, along with the shift towards highly personalised, unique and alternative weddings, that more couples are looking to an authentic wedding that just feels like them. A day that reflects who they are as a couple. I’ve seen more weddings where grooms are equally involved in everything over the past few years. It makes me happy. (It could be that more submissions to English Wedding are coming from those documentary wedding photographers I told you I loved so much.)

Photo by Lori DeJong on Unsplash

Wedding blogs are still – 15 years on – leading the way

Wedding blogs have a role to play if we’re going to shift the wedding media’s outlook so grooms are an equal focus for the industry. Rock n Roll Bride is fabulous for challenging gender stereotypes amongst wedding publications (fabulous, actually, for many, many other things). It’s on social media where I see more traditional posts which support the old fashioned media: weddings often still look like a women-only parade. Even the massive instagram accounts with hundreds of thousands of followers are posting masses and masses of flowers, impossibly feminine styling and insane dresses (but no suits). So while I have absolutely no influence over the future of weddings on instagram, I have utter faith in the side of the wedding media I do know, and that’s blogs and photographers.

… and here at English Wedding:

I promise to keep sharing images with grooms, and weddings where there is no bride. And I promise to love those images equally.

I promise to always follow documentary wedding photographers whose work I adore because it doesn’t exclude men. (Note: I do adore how the wedding photography community represents equality more than it did when English Wedding began in 2009. Most wedding photographers were men when this blog started! Now, photography communities have the most amazing mix of everyone, with women and men and people in between, and I love that.)

And I promise that I will do my best to drive the change from weddings being seen as the responsibility of only women, to a joyful collaboration and a partnership between couples who are head over heels in love, where no one has to hide behind their partner so the photo looks prettier.

Header image by Cansu Hangül on Unsplash

The post Not all weddings have a bride. So why are grooms practically hidden away by wedding media?  appeared first on English Wedding.

The email went on to unveil some industry secrets – or as I’d put it, propagate some wedding myths. Namely, the one about suppliers charging more for anything with ‘wedding’ in the name.

Give. Me. Strength.

So this just isn’t true, and I could point you towards hundreds of beautifully written articles by wedding designers and suppliers who pour their hearts and souls into making amazing wedding items, value their work and completely deserve the prices they charge for their products and services which make weddings special. However – I’m pretty sure most of you reading this blog are savvy enough to know that ‘saying wedding will put prices up’ is a big fat lie. In this case (the email I received) it’s a lie put out by a big online business to damage the reputation of, and take customers away from small independent brands. Nice.

So then – and I read the entire email, fuming a little bit by now! – they shared some cost saving tips with me. They recommended using cheap business cards as place names, postcards for invitations and – FFS – flyers for your orders of service and menus. Flyers?!! Those floppy, shiny things on super thin paper?

Oh, and I forgot they called out “one prominent wedding stationer” for “offering 100 wedding invites at a staggering £210.”

Who’s staggering? If you staggered a little as you read that line, please do let me know!

There is a price point which suits every couple when it comes to wedding stationery. Some of you will be really invested in the look and tone of your wedding, and want to make the most of beautiful stationery and signage as a key part of your decor.

For others, it might not be so important, and that’s fine! Printed or handwritten invitations aren’t essential – but they can be a beautiful addition and set the scene for your day – and £210 seems a really low price to pay for 100 invitations.

By buying from a local maker or independent designer, you can customise and personalise invitations and support a small business while you do.

As well as writing English Wedding, I make wedding stationery for a living. I’m a calligrapher. I write wedding place names and I take a lot of pride in my work.

I admire, follow and look up to a lot of wedding stationery designers who are talented, creative and wonderful people, really invested in the weddings they work on and the couples they get to know along the way. 

I’m a big fan of gorgeous fabric banners with lettering and calligraphy, and of alternative table names and all the little creative ways I’ve seen couples use stationery in styling their weddings.

I also understand that not everyone can afford expensive wedding stationery – but my advice would always be to focus on a few little personal touches which make your day really special, rather than buying in bulk, on the cheap, from a massive print factory with a crappy attitude.

If a printer contacts me with a lovely email showcasing their products, taking real pride in their customer service and – most importantly – doing it without being unkind to other businesses, then I’ll always consider sharing their products with English Wedding readers.

I have nothing against large-scale printers: but I’m always here first and foremost for the independents. They’re what makes the modern UK wedding industry so amazing – all of those little brands full of heart and soul, creating special, unique little touches for weddings, which are supposed to be really personal and intimate occasions – with every little element coming from that same place of love and care.

Right from the start, this email recognised us little independents (before going on to recommend you don’t support us) – when they said the wedding industry presents “a rich income source to small businesses and sole traders who provide everything for the big day, from dresses and flowers to cakes, entertainment and table decorations.”

This print company also quoted the average wedding cost as being over £20,000. I’ve always been really sceptical of “average budget” figures and never publish them on English Wedding – apart from today’s exception, sorry! This one was interesting because the day before I’d had an email from HSBC quoting the average cost of a UK wedding to be £13,520.

Now, I also have a marketing degree. And if there’s one thing I learned in those four years of study, it was to apply common sense to your communications. Let’s take wedding blogs, for instance: we’re supported by amazing, small independent business owners. And as a blogger since 2009, I will stand up and defend every one of those little independents fiercely when I have to!

Support small business. Shop from creative brands, locally if you can. Enjoy discovering artists and craftspeople who will care deeply about the beautiful wedding items they make for you. And if you really can’t afford to, ask around your friends. Someone with creative flair or a love of art is always, always going to make your wedding a hundred times more special than a mass print factory.

And finally… they ended their delightful little press release with a suggestion that “absent loved ones” could be represented at weddings by life-sized cutouts.

I’m not going to tell you who this email came from. That wouldn’t be nice. But I will say it’s a brand I’d never heard of, who have a large scale business-to-business printing operation and a small wedding print section on their website. They’re clearly targeting the wedding market… but they have a lot to learn. 

The post I personally would never buy from this online wedding printer… here’s why appeared first on English Wedding.

2020 is going to change weddings. Couples have been shaken in a rollercoaster of announcements, postponements and limitations since the first lockdown last March. For some of us, the change has affected our whole lives: we’ve lost loved ones to a pandemic which could have been prevented, had our government and others worldwide acted quickly. Others have lost jobs, finances, homes, relationships and more – the effects on daily life of 2020 have been unbelievable.

My heart goes out to young couples who’ve put their lives on hold because of postponed weddings. It breaks for people in their twenties whose love lives have been trampled over by the virus and by the restrictions we’ve had to abide by to save lives. The mental health impact of 2020 for our generation has been huge, and the isolation and fear caused by covid will have a long term effect we’ve yet to really comprehend.

I feel I’m taking a deep dive into social trauma here, but I wanted to publish this piece about the future of weddings, and so I’m mindful of who will be getting married in the coming decade. Those isolated fifteen year olds, and university students who were locked in halls in 2020, will potentially be planning their weddings in 2030. Will they see weddings differently because their life experience has been so sharply estranged from that of the generation before them?

More than just a pretty celebration

The wedding industry and wedding media are often guilty of existing in a cloud of happy fluff. I hold my hands up: it’s easier to publish a styled photoshoot I’ve been sent by a lovely wedding planner I want to support, than it is to pen an article about the psychology of weddings. It’s easier to share newlyweds’ happiness and smile at their gorgeous photos than it is to step back and consider the responsibilities of the wedding industry’s shared voice. But that happy fluff we share on a daily basis has the potential to whip itself up like candy floss on a stick, to grow and become so huge and overwhelming it blinds engaged couples to the serious side of wedding planning: loans, debt and insurance anyone?

[Don’t click away just yet… it gets lighter, I promise!]

Occasionally, we need to stop, breathe, and take a look at the bigger picture. What do weddings mean? How do they fit into the rest of our lives? How will something as awful as a global pandemic impact the future of weddings?

Independent wedding businesses

Economically, 2020 has been devastating for many wedding businesses. Big names and venues have disappeared: with no bookings and big overheads, the What About Weddings campaign states 40% of wedding businesses are at risk from closure as a result of the pandemic (and having little to no support from the government). This will have a short- and long-term impact on couples planning weddings in the coming years.

At first, suppliers will be heavily booked with a backlog of couples who’ve postponed their weddings. 2022 and 2023 will be VERY busy years for weddings (so long as the pandemic doesn’t continue to affect us in those years). This will lead to a DIY trend, with couples scaling back on professional suppliers and making decor, stationery, cakes and bouquets themselves.

Very sadly, some of the incredible independent businesses which make up the wedding industry have already been forced to cease trading. This is a huge shame and will leave big gaps in the wedding industry which will be keenly felt in their local areas. In the short term, this again means a lack of providers for coming wedding seasons, as well as choice for couples.

In the long term though, this gap in the market will be filled. New businesses will spring up all over the UK, and bring new life and character to the wedding industry.

Trends in styling and planning

Weddings are like fashion: styles and trends come and go every year or two. The industry shifts in line with current wedding trends, and the past decade has seen vintage and boho styling, fine art photography and urban wedding styles. The most recent trend before 2020 turned the wedding world upside down was sustainability. All of these follow wider high street trends.

Weddings with personality

Planning a wedding is all about creating a celebration of you, as a couple. Whether you’re laid back and extrovert, music lovers or fashionable urbanites, your wedding celebrations will reflect your personalities. (And literally anything goes – just be YOU!)

Outsiders to the wedding industry may sniff and assume we’re talking about the colour of the bunting and what goes in the wedding favours – but it’s not a superficial consideration at all. Laid back couples might have a celebrant-led ceremony on a hill and sharing platters with 15 guests in granny’s garden. Music lovers might opt for a quick registry office ‘do’ and a mini festival at a local pub. Everything from budgets to guest lists will be decided based on personality. (And nowhere, ever, are couples styling their weddings just to compete with their cousin-who-got-married-last-year-and-hired-a-castle.) It’s not about that any more, if it even ever was.

With personality being key, the way we’ve changed as a result of the pandemic could be huge for weddings. Some of us are bound to be more cautious. Some will be shy of big crowds. Some will be desperate to see as many friends as possible. There will be the social butterflies, the party lovers, the quiet folks who don’t want a fuss. And there’ll be a rainbow of weddings shaped by all of these different personalities.

Early in the pandemic, I read an article predicting wedding trends for “when this is all over”. There were two distinct opinions: one, that we’d all be desperate to celebrate, post-war style, with street parties and big spends. Life (or 2021, as the article put it back then) would be one huge party.

The other opinion was that we’d be careful: careful with our money, spending little (again mirroring post-war society) and with a strong sense of community. Weddings would be cheaper, smaller, and more intimate.

Both of these seemed equally valid (and appealing!) to me, so I reached out to some wedding business friends to see what their predictions for the future of weddings might be.

Dressmaker Ailsa Munro: “I think there’s going to be a deeper understanding of the way that weddings serve as a meeting point for the whole community. In the past people have talked about weddings as if they are a selfish indulgence, but a year away has given us a new perspective because we understand that in a world where our loved ones can and do live all over the country and world, coming together to eat and laugh and dance is so important and what other events enable us to do this like weddings? I think we’re going to see an increase in wedding weekends and bigger group functions like stag and hens.”

It’s such an important point to make. Voices in the wider media have dismissed weddings over the last year (Rishi Sunak’s crushing ‘not a viable business’ assessment of the wedding industry hurt, a lot) but this only comes from ignorance of what weddings mean to the generation they mostly belong to.

If we want to build strong community and support mental health, we need human connection. We need day-to-day interaction, and we need strong bonds in families, and supportive friendships. Where else will we as a society find a space to have meaningful, honest conversations about our mental health? Friendships are hugely important – and even a micro wedding is a unique opportunity to build on a strong friendship so it becomes a loving support network for life.

Gemma, The Lilypad Florist: “I actually think they will get smaller. Partly as people have realised who their real circle is, not ‘needing’ the great big elaborate day, as well as financial based decisions… There are still thousands of people who are getting engaged, desperate to tie the knot, but who will really struggle to pull all the suppliers together now as order books are pretty chocca for the next couple of years.

“I think that venues are the first barrier – so perhaps [we’ll see] a move towards registry office and then alternate venues, which in turn I feel will result in smaller weddings (think pubs, small garden marquees, etc). Lots of mid week weddings happening too!

“Perhaps couples will go slightly more DIY? Personally I would be a bit wary of booking and paying deposits right now in case businesses fold – it’s sad but I have seen it happening.”

Smaller, thriftier and more DIY weddings are already happening around the UK, and they’re all the more beautiful for that personal touch. As suppliers like Gemma approach capacity for wedding bookings, there’ll be less availability and many couples will forgo professionally made stationery, cakes and styling.

Photographer Hannah Larkin: “I think Covid has shown just how special a small wedding or intimate elopement can be – they can be beautiful, meaningful & really reflect the couple. So I think we’ll see more of these tiny but perfect celebrations.

“I also think there’ll be a trend for more outdoor weddings & more celebrant-led weddings as they can take place wherever you’d like to get married.

“And lastly I think there’ll be more emphasis on family – whether that’s grandparents walking down the aisle with you, displaying framed photos of past family weddings, having more family members give a speech or celebrating in your family home.”

All of these are going to really resonate with couples, not least the flexibility of outdoor weddings and celebrants. If there’s one trend I’d love to see emerge after 2021, it’s booking independent celebrants for personalised wedding ceremonies.

Camera Hannah: “I think we will see generally more people having smaller weddings but not necessarily out of caution. I think that people will have seen a lot of small lovely weddings happening and maybe have always wanted a small wedding but might have been pressured into something bigger. I think people will feel more able to choose small if they want it because they’ve been the norm for a year. Some people might not have realised that a small wedding can feel as special as they do and realise that’s what they really want.

“But big weddings will still come back for the people who want it. I’d imagine after a year of not being able to have lots of people in the same room that hunger for that is even stronger than before.”

Alicia, Red Maple Photography: “The trend on inquiries is definitely smaller for 2022 guests than I would have thought.
So far it seems to be 40-60 as the max. This may be to protect themselves in case things flare up again but at the same time I think people just want to get married and are aware of how quickly things can change moving into the future with Covid. It’ll be a few years before it sorts itself out I think… I think people will spend more on details because they don’t have the cost of lots of guests.”

While it can be hard to compromise on guest lists if you have a large family and friendship group, we definitely agree the flexibility of lower numbers is a wise wedding planning move.

Octavia, Occasionally Octavia: “I think smaller weddings could grow in popularity as couples may realise the value of intimate celebrations with their nearest and dearest, looking to host something more old fashioned. There is also financial recovery to consider after so much redundancy and furloughing. Small occasions don’t mean less important!”

Akilah, Events with Akilah: “A lot more couples will feel comfortable streaming to guests who can’t make it. It’s all about small details and home destination weddings are going to be a big deal.”

Akilah’s prediction fits neatly with the smaller weddings we’re expecting to see in the coming years. Wedding weekends were already on the rise, where couples will hire a venue with accommodation for 10 – 20 guests and spend the weekend together, tying in a much-needed holiday with the celebration of their marriage.

Two futures for UK weddings

It’s really interesting to see two very different expectations for the future of weddings coming through from many suppliers. One, for smaller weddings where money will be saved on guest lists and the focus will be on human connections with much-missed friends and family. And another, for larger weddings where people are gathering in numbers, celebrating not just the couple’s love but also the joy of togetherness after a tough year, often more, spent apart.

There’s a best of both worlds scenario too. A future of weddings where closeness and connection reigns supreme, and where we apply all the lessons we’ve learned in 2020, both as wedding suppliers and couples planning to marry. Where we appreciate that smaller can be better, and that thriftiness is a healthy habit and foundation for married life: where we avoid debt and focus on precious moments which are, after all, what matter most.

My own prediction is that the trend for sustainable weddings will come out of the pandemic stronger and prouder than before. Sustainability isn’t just about cutting down carbon footprints of imported florals, serving plant based meals or wearing an ethically produced, peace silk wedding dress.

Sustainability is about no more wedding loans, and no more waste or purchases made just for one day. It’s about conscious consumerism: seeking out and supporting those businesses who are environmentally aware, donating a percentage of their profits to charities and reducing their own impact on the planet.

And it’s about hiring wedding decor, not buying, not reselling on eBay the week after. Sustainable, smaller weddings are special when they involve family in thoughtful ways: when green-fingered parents can grow a bouquet, or your family’s star bakers can bring treats to share instead of buying a cake.

It’s time for a sea change in weddings.

It’s time for elopements and micro weddings to be our “new normal”, while larger celebrations with 100+ guests and a sit down meal are an option for people who can afford it without going into debt.

It’s also time for the wedding industry to step up and talk about finances and the debt many couples face after marriage. Because your best day ever should be the beginning of a sustainable life together – and as we’ve struggled to make ends meet through the pandemic, blowing money we don’t have on expensive weddings just doesn’t seem right any more.

The future of weddings has to be sustainable, backed by a creative industry which will grow stronger – and I’m proud to be a part of it.

The post The Future of Weddings appeared first on English Wedding.

English Wedding hit 10 years of wedding inspiration back in November. I don’t know where the time has gone – it feels like only yesterday this whole crazy snowball of a wedding blog began, and I love our little part of the internet as fiercely as ever! In 10 years though, I’ve changed. I’ve teetered around the edge of becoming wholly vegan for a few years (I’m still failing on chocolate) and I’m more and more conscious of the climate crisis with every passing week. So I’ve been thinking this morning about how I can really bring my little wedding blog more in line with my personal values.

The beauty of most wedding blogs is their independence. Wedding bloggers are real, live, human people with hearts and souls – and we’re absolutely free to share our heartfelt opinions with the world. There’s no company line to toe, no restrictions on what we can say, and we choose the brands and little businesses we can shout about on our little bloggy pages. So let’s start there:

It’s super important for the environment and for the economy (in the shadow of StupidBrexit) to support small businesses and local, independent creatives. When you’re planning your wedding, you’re in a brilliant position to make a real difference to little businesses in your area. So I want to really focus on promoting independent wedding brands on English Wedding in 2020.

Sustainability is so important to me – and I’ll be doing everything I possibly can to make my calligraphy business as ethical as can possibly be. On English Wedding I’ll look for other sustainable brands to tell you about: and if you need more inspiration, there’s the amazing Green Union blog which showcases some amazing ethical wedding brands. Make no mistake: this is the future, and we want to be there. Sustainable wedding businesses are about to hit the spotlight and if that’s YOU, I want to hear all about what you do!

I’m VERY happy that hog roasts have gone out of fashion – the days when photographers would include a pic of a dead pig in their submissions are long gone… but through the real weddings and shoots I’ve published in 2019 I’ve tried to avoid publishing a single image of any meat-based wedding food on the blog! It’s a little thing, but you won’t see canapés with parma ham, or plates of steaming hot roasts on this wedding blog. I delete them. Likewise when I’m writing calligraphy menus for a photoshoot – they’re always vegan menus. Cakes now… there are LOTS of cake pics. And vegan wedding cakes get bonus points of course!

It’s always made me uncomfortable hearing the term ‘bridal industry’ – especially when it’s used interchangeably with ‘wedding industry’. There are two people in every wedding – and there isn’t necessarily a bride! The whole topic of inclusivity is huge: this means more to me than simply publishing same-sex weddings (which I do, as often as I possibly can: a wedding is a wedding and the more variety we can include in our features, the better!) and I actually think the word ‘bride’ has far too much baggage attached to it. There are those of us who’ve always dreamed of being ‘a bride’ but equally, I feel strongly that it excludes those of us who aren’t ‘girly girls’ (for want of a better word) from the whole wedding circus.

Perhaps that’s a good thing.

Perhaps the future is about making a commitment without having to conform to traditional ‘bride’ and ‘groom’ roles. Perhaps the ‘wedding circus’ can be sidestepped… and perhaps English Wedding can play an active part in sharing stories of love and commitment in a more inclusive, simpler, more forward-thinking way. I’d like to find a new way of naming those key roles in weddings! Tough challenge, I know…

There are dozens of wedding blogs out there in 2020, all with a different vibe and aesthetic. As with the print magazines you see on the high street, with wedding blogs some are high end, fashion and beauty (think Vogue) and some are cheap & cheerful (think Take a Break) … For the record, I wouldn’t read either of these! Why? Because neither are real. Neither are about real people living nice, normal lives. And both cast something of a shadow – Vogue with the aspirations to be perfect, rich, and beautiful; Take a Break with its ridiculous soap opera-style ‘journalism’. I’m sure both are there because they sell. But neither give balance.

So it’s important to me that English Wedding features real people. Real weddings, couples of all sizes, colours and backgrounds – and all of us celebrating joy, love and commitment. We’re all from diverse backgrounds – some of us will be more thrifty in our wedding planning and others will have more to splash out. I want to feature everyone’s weddings – including village hall parties, celebrations at home, elopements and wedding festivals! And all with a sense of shared joy and happiness, without judgement or pressure.

Photo credit: Damion Mower Photography

I can’t leave this article without mentioning flowers. Having sustainable wedding flowers is a bit of a minefield… and I have another half-written feature I really should finish, so we can talk properly about wedding flowers and sustainability. (any florists out there, please get in touch if you’d like to join the discussion!) Fresh flowers are often imported; or are grown using pesticides and fertilisers. Organic flowers grown locally – for these are the most ethical of all – can be a risk, although it’s undoubtedly one I’d take in a heartbeat! The joy of having the most beautiful, home grown flowers on my wedding day – whatever they happened to be – would be incredible! I’m a huge advocate of using growing plants & foliage in pots as wedding decor… but we’ll chat about that another day!

The only decision I’m really struggling to make is Facebook. I want to leave – but honestly, I’m not brave enough. And I know lots of you are still using the site to find suppliers, to advertise your businesses, and to share your wedding plans.

I don’t use it. I haven’t since the political scandals began, since I realised the extent of the data Facebook collects about every tiny aspect of our lives, and how it builds complex psychological profiles for every single one of us. It’s creepy! But reluctantly, I’ll admit that it’s still important enough to YOU that we stay there. So I will continue to share English Wedding features on Facebook – but not every day. Instead, English Wedding will be on Instagram (I know it’s owned by Facebook, but the data side of it is different!) sharing the most beautiful and inspiring content as often as we possibly can!

So those are my plans for the coming year. I want to be good. I want to be ethical, and I want to help you plan a beautifully sustainable wedding with the help of fabulous, good people. Stick around – and get in touch if you’d like to be a part of things! You’ll find me at info@english-wedding.com

The post A promise – to share the love of ethical EVERYTHING in weddings in 2020! appeared first on English Wedding.

Wedding traditions can be so much fun – the clouds of confetti, the giggles as your girls help with your garter in the morning, the cutting of the cake and your first dance… But they can also be a little awkward. Throwing the bouquet to your single friends isn’t a comfortable moment for everyone. And sadly not all of us are lucky enough to have our dads there to walk us down the aisle.

So when I think of wedding traditions, it’s the new, fun and entertaining ones I love. The rest I can do without! And I’m so happy to see modern couples making their own traditions, and happily ignoring the old fashioned etiquette! This is one time when you might really need to stick to your guns with the whole “your day, your way” mantra – and don’t let anyone make you feel obliged to embrace traditions you’re really not comfortable with!

Traditions rear their heads even before the wedding day. For example, I’ve been to a few combined stag and hen dos – commonly known as ‘sten dos’ – and they’re the best thing ever. For any of us who aren’t into tacky sashes and worrying straws / or expensive European city breaks and alcohol poisoning, the sten do is a fantastic new wedding tradition I can wholeheartedly recommend!

Another modern day tradition I love is that brides and grooms are walking down the aisle together more and more often. It’s a lovely solution for anyone – but especially if your dad isn’t around, if you’re a same sex couple, or if you’re a feminist! In less conventional venues where there isn’t an aisle as such (think festival weddings, or outdoor / woodland ceremonies) it saves a lot of logistical planning (hiding) too! Meeting your partner before the ceremony is also a huge help if you suffer from anxiety – having his / her hand to hold as you walk down the aisle will calm your nerves more than anything else in the world!

The main wedding tradition which endures for me – and I think always will – is confetti. Throwing brightly coloured petals or tissue paper makes for the prettiest photos of all – and everyone is involved. Most couples still do the confetti thing – just make sure yours is biodegradable and bird-friendly please!

There are no rules about wedding speeches any more. Brides very often make a speech on the big day, and I’ve seen and heard some brilliant ones! The old-school etiquette of speeches being the men’s domain is long gone; now the bride, mother-of-the-bride, and bridesmaids will often make a speech if they want to. The flip side of this new wedding tradition is that anyone who isn’t comfortable making a speech shouldn’t feel pressured into doing so. Dads, best men, even the groom shouldn’t be forced to speak if they’re nervous – so think carefully about who’d LIKE to speak on your big day, and ask them to do it!

Modern couples are perfectly happy to only embrace the wedding traditions they choose – so if you’d rather get straight to partying than having a receiving line, you can! You can also happily ditch the old bouquet toss (singling out your single girl friends for an entertaining but possibly humiliating scramble to catch it?) and avoid the first dance if you’d rather not be centre stage for a smoochy number and your guests’ phones all centred on your shuffling feet.

The last tradition I feel I should mention – and which can really mean a lot to your guests – is thank you cards. Whether you send out a printed note to all your guests or a personal text message, this is one time in your life when it will feel so good to say thank you from your heart.

The post Following wedding traditions – it’s a pick and choose thing in 2019! appeared first on English Wedding.